Parents Share Their Advice on Moving Abroad With Kids in Tow

• Moving abroad with kids can be challenging.
• BI spoke to parents about how they helped their kids navigate the move.
• Parents suggested telling kids about the move early and involving them in decision-making.

Moving abroad is never straightforward, and with kids in tow, it becomes even more complicated.

Additional factors come into play, from finding the right school and dealing with negative reactions to explaining cultural differences.

“The truth is that as meaningful and life-changing as moving abroad can be, it can be hard, no matter how experienced you feel,” Stacy Ennis, who moved her family to Thailand and Portugal, previously wrote for Business Insider.

“When kids are involved, the chances of hardship are even higher,” she added.

BI spoke to parents and relocation consultants who uprooted their lives in the US to move to different parts of the world.

Here are their best pieces of advice:

1. Start the conversation early

Genie Doi knew she wanted to leave the US with her family after a shooting near her son’s school in Los Angeles. He was 5 years old at the time, and when she told him about the move, he was upset, she said. He worried about leaving his grandparents, friends, and toys behind.

“We tried to prepare him for a year just by talking about how exciting this change is going to be,” said Doi, who moved in 2022. Before moving, they also visited his new school in Japan so he could familiarise himself with the environment and try to make some friends.

“It was a really smooth transition for him,” said Doi.

2. Plan ahead for school

In 2016, Jackie Baxa relocated from Wyoming to Seville, Spain, with her husband and two sons, who were 9 and 13 at the time. Now, she is a relocation coach for families looking to do the same.

Baxa said that education is a factor that weighs heavily on parents’ minds. Things to consider include the language in which classes are being taught and whether their kids have the capacity to pick up a second language.

“Do what you can to foster language development in a way that doesn’t feel like you’re adding more school to the child,” said Baxa, whose sons chose to stay in Europe for college and are now fluent in Spanish.

3. Find a piece of home abroad

Besides packing sentimental items from home, Baxa suggested finding bridging activities to help your kids adapt abroad.

Knowing that her kids were big soccer fans, Baxa and her husband brought them to watch professional games. “We knew that that would be really special for them, and it was special for all of us,” she said.

She added that capitalizing on what kids identify with and expanding them into new interests can also create psychological comfort.

“It could open up pathways to friendships and things that will make them feel better about what they’ve left behind,” she said.

4. Involve your kids in the decision-making process

Anna Sosdian, an international relocation consultant at StartAbroad, suggested that parents involve their kids in decision-making.

“Make them feel like they have some control over some of the details,” she said, whether that’s letting them decide what to do on their first day or choosing which room they will have in the new home.

When Jennifer Kusch told her teenage sons that they were relocating to Dubai for her work, they told her she was “ruining” their lives, she told BI.

But they eventually warmed up to the idea. Kusch moved to Dubai six weeks early to settle into their new home. On trips to Ikea, she video-called her kids so they could choose their bedding and furniture.

“I tried to keep them as involved as possible,” she said.

5. Your mood affects your kids

Celia Robbins, who moved to Berlin with her husband and four kids, said she tried to stay positive for her kids. “If you’re not happy, it’s hard for them to be happy,” she said.

To help them better integrate, she and her husband networked and joined communities on Facebook.

They also sent their kids to German language classes and enrolled them in a German American school.

“We are trying hard to be ourselves while also appreciating the community and the culture that we’re a part of,” she said.

6. Encourage them to ask questions

Despite the stress of moving and potential resistance from their kids, these parents agreed on one thing: Go for it.

Learning to say goodbye to friends and being the new kid is hard, said Katie Miller, who moved from Texas to Dubai with her husband and three young kids earlier this year.

“But I’m watching each of them thrive because they’ve been stretched in new ways,” she said.

She said parents should invite their kids to be curious about the moving process.

“We told the kids there are no silly questions. We are all learning together.”