I Left My Family for a Work Conference and Added 2 Days on to Explore

I’m almost 38 years old, and I just took my first solo trip for a work conference in Dover, Delaware, this September.

For a few months leading up to the trip, every time I thought about the logistics and emotions of leaving my kids, I felt a tight knot of anxiety. I was also nervous about traveling by myself to a large conference where the only person I knew was a work connection I’d only ever met via email.

When I visualized taking this trip, it was odd how much less anxious I felt when I inserted one or more of my kids, my husband, or a friend into the narrative. The idea of taking care of another person, or simply having company, seemed easier and less intimidating than spending that time alone, thinking only about myself.

I also thought about all the times I’d forgotten a phone charger or toothbrush and how often I’d relied on others when traveling.

I feared I was just too codependent to take a trip by myself and enjoy it.

Navigating without anyone else was better than I expected

I flew a red-eye from Phoenix to Philadelphia, then summoned an Uber for the 1.5-hour drive to Dover.

Before I left, I messaged two girlfriends and asked whether they always chose female Uber drivers to feel safer when traveling alone. They told me no, but they used some of Uber’s other safety precautions, like sharing their location with someone. Before I left, I turned these features on. Thankfully, I felt comfortable in all of my rideshare scenarios and navigated to each place with relative ease.

I will admit I’m often forgetful, prone to losing my room key, and I struggle with running late. I was especially concerned about keeping my electronics charged, as my husband or teen son often handles that. But I found I was surprisingly more responsible when it was all on me.

Over the course of six days, I was never late to meetings, never lost anything important, and never let my phone die.

I wasn’t lonely like I expected to be

Since I was going to a conference, I knew I’d be surrounded by people every day, but I might still feel alone since they were strangers to me.

While there were definitely awkward moments when I stood on the outskirts of conversations, I’m relatively chatty and friendly and was able to connect with others. My prior work connection turned out to be lovely in person as well, which definitely helped.

I also basked in the alone time in my hotel each evening. As a busy working mom, I hardly ever watch movies or have time to myself to do whatever I want, so I selected a long movie I’d wanted to see for a long time, caught up on work, and listened to an audiobook.

I got to enjoy doing things I love without having to check in with anyone else

Perhaps the best part of solo traveling came at the end, when I spent two additional days after the conference exploring nearby Wilmington and the surrounding area, nicknamed America’s “Chateau Country.”

I felt like I’d woken up in Europe.

In total, I toured three elaborate du Pont family mansions and sprawling gardens, visited an art museum, breakfasted at the iconic Hotel Du Pont, and returned to Longwood Gardens, which I remembered vividly from my childhood.

No one whined at me that they were tired, bored, or hungry. I didn’t have to chase a toddler through the gardens or change plans because someone decided they were fed up with all this American history.

Getting to indulge in the things that interest me most made me realize I was pretty good company. I took my time ogling over presidential fine china and Tiffany glass and lingering over historians’ stories of hand-painted murals and family trees.

I discovered that I liked hanging out with myself and that it’s much easier than family travel. Besides, I made friends as I went, so I was never really lonely.

Would I solo travel again?

Absolutely.