My husband and I both grew up in the same small town in Southern Illinois. I distinctly remember visiting relatives in the Chicago suburbs and dreaming of when I could live somewhere with so much to see and do. Though I did enjoy my childhood, growing up in the country and spending hours outside, I craved something different for my own children.
After my husband and I got married, we settled into renting a townhouse in a town, two hours away from our hometown, just outside St. Louis. A few years later, we bought our first home, brought home two children, and then moved to a bigger home two towns over. We added two more children to our family and settled into suburban life.
Though it’s normal to miss home, and we certainly enjoy visiting our families in our hometown, we are very grateful we made the choice to move, especially for the sake of our four children.
We didn’t grow up here
We didn’t grow up where we live now, and thus, we don’t feel like we have to “live up to our last name,” nor does everyone know our business and the business of our family members.
Moving to a town where we have no roots means we have a clean slate to be ourselves and who we want to be, versus feeling like we have to fulfill some sort of prophecy based on family history.
There are more extracurricular options
I remember wanting to learn gymnastics as a child. However, because our town was small and low-income, the closest gymnastics facility didn’t open several towns away until I had outgrown my gymnastics phase.
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We had very limited extracurricular options outside the already limited options our school offered. Living in a more populated place means my kids have loads of options when it comes to sports, the arts, and clubs.
There’s more competition
When it comes to my kids’ sporting activities, and when one of my kids was in Scholar Bowl, there was more competition here. Competition pushes them to learn more and improve their skills — upping the ante. We don’t push our kids to be the best of the best, not by any means, but we do like to see them grow through challenges.
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The kids stay busy
When my husband and I were dating as young college students, we had few options for things to do and places to go. A lot of our peers hung out in a fast-food parking lot almost every night. Others dashed from party to party, participating in illegal activities.
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Because my kiddos, especially my teens, have their extracurricular activities, which keep them quite busy, they don’t have much time to be bored. Thus, they don’t have the time to be bored enough to run around “getting into trouble.”
We have more medical options
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My family sees multiple medical specialists. Because we live near a major city, St. Louis, with some of the best healthcare options, we live close enough to choose among many medical professionals and facilities. In fact, we are very fortunate that some of them have built smaller centers in St. Louis’ neighboring towns.
We have more job opportunities
Without moving or significant commutes, my husband and I have been able to work close to home or even from home. This allows us to spend less time driving and more time at home with our kids or attending activities with them. I’ve had wonderful experiences teaching at both a local university and a local community college. In fact, my current teaching gig is six minutes away from my house.
Though I miss many parts of moving away from home, including seeing relatives more often and enjoying more time outside, the pros have outweighed the cons. Moving our family from a small town to a suburb has offered us countless opportunities that have benefited our whole family — especially our four kids.
