My 20-Year-Old Son and I Had Never Hung Out — Until Our First Cruise

My son is 20, but I can’t think of a time when just the two of us hung out one-on-one. I went on numerous individual outings with his two sisters, shopping or dining at restaurants, but never alone with him.

My recent two-week cruise to England, Scotland, and Norway was supposed to be a trip with my older daughter — and his twin sister —but she had to back out.

My son stepped in, giving us a rare opportunity to connect as mother and son.

The backstory of how we got here

When I learned the gender of my twins while I was pregnant, I’ll admit I was nervous about having a boy and a girl. Everyone else we would have the “perfect” American family, but two girls sounded more manageable.

I had no idea what it meant to raise a son. I grew up with two sisters, so boys were kind of a mystery. Even though I had a husband, I still felt unprepared to understand the male experience.

I did my best, though. I watched “Thomas & Friends” (which was surprisingly soothing), threw a Minecraft Creeper party, and cheered from the sidelines while he dominated in tennis matches.

But it never occurred to me to say, “Hey, do you want to celebrate that win with Chipotle?” So when this unexpected travel twist came up, I couldn’t help think that maybe this was my chance to finally get to know my son better.

Two weeks at sea with the youngest passenger

I should’ve researched Viking cruises before booking. Based on our conversations with other passengers, the average age was somewhere around 80, and almost everyone was married. That meant my 20-year-old son was roughly 60 years younger than most of our shipmates. But he ended up loving the attention and chatting with everyone.

There were a few awkward moments, though. On our first night, when we checked in for dinner, I gave the hostess my name and room number. She smiled and said, “Follow me and I’ll show you to your table, Mr. and Mrs. Maguire.” We exchanged a look that said, technically true, but also ew. Once we sat down, I made sure to clarify, “My son is so excited to be on this cruise!” After that, she made a point to call us by our first names for the rest of the trip.

Another time, a passenger asked my son if he’d gotten on the wrong boat, referring to his young age. Without missing a beat, he compared one of the ship’s lectures to the astronomy class he’d just finished in his sophomore year. Ten minutes later, they were deep in conversation about black holes and favorite professors. Leave it to him to turn a gentle dig into an intergenerational study group. I was in awe of him.

My favorite part of the cruise was the daily tea time

Each afternoon, we headed to the atrium to sip through a selection of fruit-infused teas (yes, we tried every flavor). The teas were predictable, but the food changed daily with an assortment of desserts and bite-sized sandwiches.

On the first day, I thought, “My daughter would have loved this.” But by the end, my son, who usually avoids tea and anything sugary, liked it. I loved seeing him appreciate the ritual and enjoyed it because I did.

It felt like the first time we were able to actually connect over something.

We’re already planning our next trip

This was my son’s first trip to Europe, and the fjords might be the most beautiful scenery we’ve ever seen. But the best part was experiencing it all with him.

Thanks to our one-on-one time, I saw a new side of my son. He’s now more open to adventures — unlike his younger self. Now that I know this, I’m excited to try more things with him in the future.

On our flight home, we had a layover in Germany. He turned to me and said, “This is the next country I want to visit.” Looks like I’ve got my marching orders for our next trip.