I’m an Identical Twin — Here’s What People Always Get Wrong About Us

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Sarah Charlwood. It has been edited for length and clarity.

Throughout my life, people have been fascinated by the fact that I’m an identical twin. Usually, people love it. They’ll say: “Oh my God! There are two of you!”

My identical twin sister, Aimee, and I didn’t spend a day apart from the moment we were born until we were 16.

Back then, it was almost impossible to tell us apart, but these days, the differences are slightly more apparent — my face is rounder, and Aimee’s hair is shorter, among other things.

We would switch classes in school

We get bombarded with questions, and usually I love people’s interest. Sometimes, though, people’s comments can be insensitive. I’ve been asked, “Does your sister’s nose go up like yours does?” Strangers sometimes point out a perceived flaw to demonstrate they can tell the difference.

At school, though, we played upon being confused with each other. At the teachers’ request, I wore yellow ribbons to school, and Aimee wore blue. Most days, we swapped our ribbons so we had one of each color, and then we could swap classes. We played to our separate strengths: I took Aimee’s Japanese and music exams, and she took my tennis exam for me. Teachers could only tell us apart by our ribbons or our backpacks. They had no idea we bluffed for each other. I don’t think even our parents knew.

At 16, we both went to cadet camp, but Aimee went home sick after the first night. Within two hours of her departure, I was standing at a phone, calling her. It felt too bizarre not having her there to talk to. She moved to England after university, and we emailed and texted every single day. It was during that time that I began to get more accustomed to not spending all my time with her.

We share many interests

Most commonly, we get asked about boyfriends and if we like the same guys; (no). We’ve never gone after the same guy, but I did, at my sister’s request, break up with her boyfriend for her once at school. He didn’t realize it was actually me.

We do share many other tastes and interests. We share a Spotify playlist and an Instagram reel list folder. We read the same books, and have the same food preferences (we both dislike marzipan). We recently discovered our favourite book is the same.

One of the best parts about being an identical twin is sharing a wardrobe — we genuinely have the same style and like and share the exact same clothes. If she buys a $100 skirt, it’s really only $50 because we both get to wear it on rotation. We never owe each other money — we take turns buying things, including dinners. I’ll see her at least two to three times a week. We never argue.

I love having an identical twin

People often say the most similar thing about us is the way we talk — the way we move our hands and our heads at the same time when telling a story. We do sometimes finish each other’s sentences.

Another common question is whether we’re telepathic. Eerie things do often happen. Recently, I Googled what to wear to an Olivia Rodrigo concert. I’d just typed it in when Aimee called and said, “I’ve just bought you an Olivia Rodrigo shirt from Target.” We’ve also had things like randomly having teeth out on the same day when she was overseas. It’s hard to say what’s just a coincidence. I’d say we’re in sync because we spend so much time together, but not telepathic.

I met some twins once who said they hated being identical. That really blew my mind. Having an identical twin, for me, is always having someone to talk to, always having someone there for you.

I actually cannot comprehend how people don’t have a twin sister. It’s such a privilege, one I never take for granted. I’ve never once not wanted to be a twin.