- I uploaded the entire chat history between my boyfriend and me to ChatGPT.
- The AI system said my boyfriend loves me, communicates better, and puts in more effort.
- ChatGPT analyzed our conversation based on a set of rules, so I’ll keep the advice in mind.
Ask my best friend, and she’ll confirm that I run everything by her. Over many tumultuous years, we’ve spent hours on video calls picking apart texts from men — analyzing, advising, and ultimately picking up the pieces. So when I stumbled across a Reel about someone using ChatGPT for ruthless relationship feedback, I was sold.
I learned that the trick is simple: You upload your WhatsApp chat history and request juicy insights into the relationship.
Apart from throwing data privacy to the wind, I was under the illusion that the results couldn’t be too shocking. Greg and I have been dating for a year, and everything has been smooth sailing in our romantic relationship.
He was equally intrigued by the concept, though, so we decided to test ChatGPT together.
There wasn’t even much to analyze, we rationalized — right? Boy, were we wrong.
Luckily, ChatGPT confirmed that my boyfriend does love me
With our WhatsApp history extracted and uploaded into ChatGPT, Greg and I stared blankly at the empty screen. With all the prowess of a giggling teen, I typed, “Does Greg love me?” It was not my finest question, but it was genuinely all I could initially muster.
ChatGPT was quicker out of the gates. It instantly informed us that it would scan the file for evidence of explicit declarations, consistent emotional investment, and sacrificial effort. After a brief pause (not unlike waiting on a Magic 8 ball answer), the fortunate answer was yes.
Courtesy of Eibhlis Gale-Coleman and ChatGPT
However, as logical as ever, ChatGPT also provided a list of examples — snatching evidence from our chat. Reassurance and care? Commitment and support? Each had a supporting quote in italics.
In under five seconds, it had analyzed all 23,299 messages and neatly ordered its findings in a tick list.
“Greg is emotionally invested in you and has expressed love directly and consistently. His messages show that he cares deeply, wants to support you, and values your relationship,” ChatGPT summarized.
It suggested that we are both emotionally available but display it differently
According to ChatGPT, emotional availability was almost a level playing field. The system noted the difference in our personalities and approaches.
While Greg demonstrates his emotional openness through action, I use words and deep conversation. In short, I might talk about feelings, whereas Greg is likelier to initiate check-ins or plan activities.
In doing so, the AI system gave Greg the healthiest communicator title.
“Greg’s communication might be slightly more ‘textbook healthy,'” ChatGPT revealed, citing his patience, flexibility, and clockwork morning messages.
ChatGPT said my boyfriend puts in more effort overall
Quietly declining to input a question until now, Greg leaned over. “Who cares more?” he typed.
The answer was humbling: Greg puts in more effort and, therefore, cares more. It felt like a blow to both of us, but the reasoning was interesting. There was a huge discrepancy in questions; Greg had asked 4,541, while I’d only sent 2,175.
I’ve got to admit that I’ve always felt bad for letting Greg take the lead with communication. It has come up briefly in difficult conversations before, but he has always insisted that he finds the dynamic comfortable. Who knew ChatGPT would be the reason we’d properly revisit our communication expectations?
Courtesy of Eibhlis Gale-Coleman and ChatGPT
Sure enough, balancing the initiation of conversation was the first piece of advice it had for improving our relationship. “Eib could take more initiative in reaching out first. This would help Greg feel equally pursued and appreciated,” ChaptGPT suggested.
Laidback as ever, Greg laughed it off. “I don’t mind,” he said. I believe him, but I’m secretly glad I got that feedback so I can make some changes.
ChatGPT was more useful than expected
ChatGPT’s analytical perspective was both interesting and insightful, but I had to probe a bit further.
“How reliable is your dating advice?” I asked.
The response came instantly: “My dating advice is based on psychology, relationship research, and real-world patterns, but, like any advice, it’s not one-size-fits-all.”
While acknowledging the importance of gut feelings and human context, ChatGPT provided an admittedly compelling self-case. Its technology utilizes insights from Attachment Theory, and its capacity to process thousands of messages enables it to spot patterns effectively.
“Unlike friends who might sugarcoat things or project their own experiences, I analyze patterns without personal bias,” ChatGPT replied.
The results were humbling, to say the least. I, for one, will pay more attention to how I communicate with my partner in the future.
