For the nine years we’ve been a couple, my husband and I have taken countless flights together.
We’ve visited family in the Carolinas, Tennessee, Montana, and Maryland. We’ve wandered around the Duomo in Florence, enjoyed tacos and tequila in Mexico City, and explored the breathtaking Normandy coastline.
Now that we live in London, travel has ramped up. We’re in our late 20s and early 30s, and wedding season has us flying back to the US on a near-monthly basis for our friends’ nuptials … in addition to other scheduled trips.
Unfortunately, we would get in a fight — almost every time — about what time to leave for the airport.
After one too many pre-flight squabbles, we stumbled on a solution
As a chronically early person, I hate rushing and get intense anxiety about cutting things too close.
I’d rather sit in an airport for an extra hour than make a sweaty sprint through the terminal to catch a flight.
My husband, on the other hand, doesn’t like to waste time — and with his demanding, meeting-filled job, he rarely has a moment to spare.
His perfect travel day involves passing through security as the plane begins boarding. Though that’s anxiety-inducing to me, for what it’s worth, he’s only ever missed one flight.
Because of this, in the hours before a flight, I’d be huffing around our apartment with bags packed and shoes on. He’d get frustrated that I was rushing him, and I’d get annoyed that he was making us “late.”
Cue lots of tense moments and grumpy silence in transit.
A few months ago, ahead of yet another long-haul flight to the US, I suggested what I thought was a reasonable time to leave — not too early, not too late. My husband wanted to leave even later.
I decided to just leave when I wanted to avoid the stress and inevitable argument. We were taking public transportation, so the cost was the same either way.
I told him I’d meet him at the gate, gave him a quick kiss, and made my way — happily, unhurriedly — to the airport. He arrived much later, but still on time.
We proceeded to have the smoothest trip we’d ever had in nine years.
Arriving when we want to helps us manage our own time and start a trip on a positive note
Currie Engel
Since we started arriving at the airport separately, we noticed tons of other benefits, too.
My husband and I have very different work schedules, and this setup helps us both effectively manage our responsibilities. Sometimes, I’ll get to the airport extra early to take a call or put finishing touches on an assignment.
We’ve also found that there’s no financial downside to this system.
Obviously, this travel hack works best for city dwellers with easy access to public transport. It’s definitely trickier if you live out in the suburbs and either share a car or don’t want to park two at the airport.
Because we’ve only ever lived together in cities, though, this option is easy for us. Even if we planned to take an Uber together, the added cost of one of us leaving earlier on public transit is generally pretty marginal — in our case, usually no more than about $15.
Best of all, by arriving at the airport when we like, we start our trips on a positive note. The last thing we need on an already stressful travel day is to be fighting or feeling frustrated with or another.
All in all, this simple rule has helped our relationship and communication
Though this works well for us, we don’t always travel separately.
There are times when our schedules make it more convenient to head to the airport together, or we have enough luggage that it makes more sense to schedule an Uber.
In those instances, we talk through our schedules the day before to make sure we can clearly communicate expectations so that there are no surprises.
These days, though, this heading to the airport separately has become our norm. I’ll tell my husband which train I’m planning to take, and he tells me which one he’s on.
We know that we’ll see each other at the gate, one way or another.
