- I have been on cruises with my kids multiple times and we love it.
- I started giving them independence early, they are now 14 and 15 and I trust them doing their thing.
- It helps them grow to be able to navigate unfamiliar situations.
I’ve been on 20+ cruises, both with and without my kids, who are now teenagers. I think cruises are the best kind of vacation with kids because they require minimal thinking. You get to experience multiple destinations without dealing with driving directions or dragging your luggage in and out of different hotels. You don’t have to cook, and the hardest decision you probably have to make is choosing between the buffet and the dining room.
It’s also the perfect place to give kids a little independence.
It all started with reading the signs
When they were 8 and honing their reading skills, we allowed our kids to lead us around the ship instead of the other way around. Most cruise ships have prominent signs to tell passengers what deck various activities are located on, making it easier to find your way around.
It started with heading to dinner on board the Disney Wonder. As we approached the elevator, my partner pointed to the sign and asked our boys, “How do we get to the Animator’s Palate from here?” My kids carefully read the sign and saw that the restaurant was on Deck 4 Aft. Based on that information, they learned that we had to use the elevator to go down four decks and that the restaurant was located at the back of the ship.
Courtesy of the author
It took a little coaching and allowing them to make mistakes, but by the time they were 10, my kids were confidently navigating their way around cruise ships. We allowed them to leave the dinner table when they were done eating, make their way to the kid’s club, and sign themselves in, letting my partner and I relax and enjoy each other’s company. My kids would wolf down their mac and cheese and dash off to play games with the kids they met on board, and the grownups get to linger over dessert. Everybody was happy.
When my boys turned 12, we lifted most restrictions and allowed them to roam freely on the cruise ship, with ever-loosening rules as they got older.
Yes, of course, we have rules
My boys are 14 and 15. Don’t let your mind leap to worst-case scenarios and visions of teens gone wild — grubby-handed kids cutting in line at the buffet, being loud during the shows, and running amuck on deck. While it sounds like a cliché, oblivious mom response, my kids aren’t like that. I have zero concerns about them doing something reckless, like trying to climb from one balcony to another, which is highly dangerous. They’ve earned their freedoms by behaving responsibly. And yes, of course, we have rules.
We require our kids to stay in contact with us via the chat function in the cruise line app throughout the cruise. No one is allowed in our stateroom, our kids cannot go in anyone else’s, and we all get off and on the ship together. They’re old enough to find food for themselves, but we insist on having dinner every night as a family. We communicate when planning our cruise so our kids have input and knowledge of what we’ll do as a family, and when they get free time, we reinforce that on the first day, as soon as we get on the ship.
A sense of ownership
Our approach gives our kids a sense of ownership over their vacation, which helps them enjoy it more. Although I like to think of myself as a “cool-not-a-regular” mom whose kids want to hang out with me on vacation, if I’m honest with myself, they enjoy me more in smaller doses as hanging out with their peers becomes increasingly important.
Seeing my teens commandeer unfamiliar territory using their wits and available resources is a proud mom moment, although it comes with a side of bittersweet to realize they need me less and less. Although figuring out basic shipboard geography, like being able to distinguish the port side from starboard, aren’t skills they’re likely to need in their everyday landlocked life, I see my kids making their way through all kinds of unfamiliar situations with a self-assuredness that started with a random decision to let them find their way to a shipboard restaurant.
