Living in My Favorite Place for 90 Days Before Deciding to Move: Italy

I’ve always believed that if soulmates exist, mine is not a person; it’s Italy.

Ever since I first set foot in Venice over 10 years ago, I felt a pull that I couldn’t explain. Fast forward to now, and I’ve visited all 20 Italian regions. This means that technically, I’ve seen more of Italy than I have of the US.

Many of my friends and family in New York asked me when I’d be moving to Italy, but I never had a thought-out plan to actually make the leap.

I had a laundry list of reasons it wouldn’t make sense to leave the US: a job, an apartment, a community, and most importantly, a dog. Yet, over time, I realized I didn’t want to die without saying I never tried to live in my favorite place.

Earlier this year, when my sweet Boston Terrier, Bowie, died only two weeks after I lost my New York-based job, I knew it was now or never. I had to finally move to Italy.

I made a plan to give Naples a trial run

Visa restrictions made it difficult to just move abroad and stay indefinitely. So, I decided I would give life in my favorite Italian city a test run.

As an American passport holder, I could stay in Italy for up to 90 days on a tourist visa within a 180-day period — which is exactly what I decided to do.

I promised myself that, if I fell in love with living here, I’d then return to New York and figure out a plan for obtaining a long-term visa.

First, I had to find a short-term lease in Italy, which turned out to be tricky. I visited all the major sites I’d typically look at for any long-term stay — Airbnb, Spotahome, Facebook groups, and even Booking.com — only to discover inflated prices or limited options.

While brainstorming, I remembered I still had the number of a woman whose apartment I had rented on Airbnb back in 2022. I texted her to ask if her apartment was available.

To my surprise, it was. We agreed on a monthly payment schedule, and the rest is history.

Living in Naples feels a lot different from visiting

Admittedly, I spent my first four days in Italy inside my apartment.

I realized I was recovering from burnout, but beyond that, spending time somewhere long-term added a layer of anxiety I didn’t expect.

At first, the thought of trying to go outside and speak another language felt debilitating. I was initially afraid I would sound stupid if I couldn’t find the right words in Italian, but now that I’ve been here for nearly two months, I’ve forced myself not to revert to English.

Although I still have a long way to go, I’ve made plenty of leaps language-wise — I even purchased a new pair of glasses, entirely in Italian.

I’ve also experienced new lifestyle shifts and quirks. For instance, I’m still adjusting to Italy’s recycling system: Here, you separate paper, glass, plastic, food waste, and nonorganic items into separate bins.

It sounds simple enough, but the system is a lot harder to navigate when you’re trying to figure out how to dispose of a cotton swab.

Shopping for food and household items looks different, too. In Naples, I often have to go to different stores to buy produce, meat, cheese, and toiletries, whereas I could have found all these items at one supermarket in New York.

This is a change I’ve come to embrace, though: I’ve even befriended my local butcher, Angelo, who makes the best chicken cutlets I’ve ever had.

Speaking of groceries, one of the best parts of living here is the low cost of food. I’ve been able to get a full haul of meat, cheese, wine, water, and produce for 22 euros (or about $26). This same array of items would’ve cost me closer to $150 in New York City.

Dining out is also much more affordable here. One night, I took myself to dinner and got a personal pizza and a glass of wine for just 8 euros.

Meanwhile, in New York, it’s tricky to find a nice restaurant where a glass of wine costs under $20.

Now, I appreciate Naples even more

I don’t only love Naples for its affordability, though. I appreciate all the ways it’s similar to — and different from — my home in New York City.

Southern Italy shares New York’s hard yet warm attitude, but the pace of life is much slower here. Plus, as someone who dreads New York winters, I was pleased to learn it doesn’t even snow here — the weather is warm year-round.

One of the biggest differences between the two cities is that New York is often considered the epicenter of the universe, but I’ve found Naples to be overlooked by both tourists and Italians.

Whenever I’ve traveled throughout Italy and told someone about my love for the city, I’ve been met with surprise. Even locals have seemed visibly confused — and honored — by my admiration for Naples, but after two short months, I’ve felt completely at home here.

My time seems to be running out much quicker than I anticipated, and I dread the day I board a flight back to the US. If my predictions tell me anything, it’s that I’ll be back in Naples before I know it.