In 2024, I made the potentially absurd decision to become a single mom without a full-time job.
I didn’t know how I’d handle the first few months without paid maternity leave or a partner. I briefly debated moving to Germany, where I’ve heard the parental leave is incredible.
Ultimately, staying in New York worked out better, and I was able to obtain paid maternity leave.
I thought I didn’t have paid family leave as a freelancer
I’m a freelance writer and producer. I’ve pieced together project-based work for about 20 years. Between projects, I often sublet my New York apartment and travel.
That freedom is a huge benefit — and it’s the only benefit. Even when I worked 40 hours a week as an editor at CBS News and later at Yahoo Sports, I was an hourly employee without paid vacation, 401(k) matches, or any other benefits often associated with jobs in the US.
Then, at 37, I decided to have a baby on my own. I looked for a full-time job but never landed one. I had a slight financial cushion: I’d always made the maximum contributions to my Roth IRA and HSA, and, later, a solo 401(k); starting in my late 20s, I’d invested everything else into index funds, and, a decade later, I had a decent amount invested. But I didn’t want to spend down my savings. I’d need those to actually raise a child.
I picked up an extra gig to cover IVF. Then, around the time I got pregnant, three unexpected offers came in. I said yes to everything. It was chaotic, especially while pregnant, but in eight months, I earned almost twice as much money as I typically make in a good year. I felt like I’d created my own maternity leave fund.
It was only at the very end of pregnancy that I realized there were other options.
An unexpected paid leave
About a month before my due date, a friend asked when I was starting paid family leave. I laughed. I don’t get that, I said.
She corrected me. If you’re on a project for 22 weeks and are paid on a W-2, she said, you are entitled to paid family leave.
Two of my recent projects were paid through payroll companies, which meant I was paid on a W-2.
I worried that asking for leave would ruin my relationship with the production companies. My friend said the payroll company’s insurance pays the leave; the production company never needs to know.
I called an hour later and couldn’t believe what happened next. The representative said that because I was working on two projects paid by the same payroll company, I was eligible for two paid family leaves.
He filed the claim, and for the first 12 weeks of my daughter’s life, I received $2,354 each week.
The payments didn’t cover my usual income, as parental leave does for most full-time employees in the US, but in those 12 weeks, I made enough to be a mom in New York.
European family leave gave me a new perspective
When my maternity leave ended, I wasn’t ready to return to work full-time. Instead, I left the US and traveled to Berlin for an extended stay.
There are ways European leave policies are superior, including minimum payments available even to the lowest-income parents, the length of leave, the job security attached to it, and the abundance of affordable childcare available afterward.
But overall, my paid family leave in the US seemed comparable.
This experience has made me more certain that there is no right way, or right place, to become a parent. And now, 10 months in, it’s time to figure out childcare and find work.