Chelsea Handler, 50, says being childfree didn’t stop her from taking parenting classes to show up for other kids.
On Thursday’s episode of “Dinner’s On Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson,” Handler spoke about her choice not to have children and her close relationship with the three daughters of an ex-boyfriend.
“It’s not that I don’t have a maternal instinct. I do, I just don’t want children,” Handler told podcast host Jesse Tyler Ferguson.
“I feel like not having my own children has opened me up to being in the lives of so many other children,” Handler said. “Of course, I love children. I just don’t want them around me all the time.”
The comedian said she enjoys being a positive influence on kids, whether it’s in the role of a big sister or a parental figure.
“Whatever it is, I have the bandwidth — because I don’t have children — to spend time with so many children,” she said.
Handler said she’s still close with her ex-boyfriend’s three daughters, despite dating him for only a year, in part because she recognized parts of her own upbringing in their experiences.
“I related so much to all of that because I grew up in a household where I was the youngest of six. My parents were completely checked out,” Handler said. “My brothers and sisters raised me, and I craved and wanted the parent that was going to show up to the games, and show up to the school conference nights, and be at my plays, and be at my, you know, at like the auditorium at school.”
“My parents didn’t do any of that. And so that’s what I wanted to be for them,” she continued.
Handler said she even took parenting classes for the girls.
“But I did it, and I loved it. Like, I learned so much from the psychologist about what children need to feel safe, secure, and seen,” Handler said.
She added that being involved in their lives feels meaningful to her.
“For me, since I’m not a parent, I still find it so purposeful to have influence over them in a positive way, and to go out of my way for them feels good.”
Handler has previously spoken about how being childfree has given her the freedom to build close relationships with the children in her life.
“I’ve been able to show up for other people’s children in ways that I wouldn’t be able to if I had my own family,” Handler said in an April appearance on the “Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky” podcast. “So I feel like there is an unsung story about people who don’t have children, whether it’s by choice or by, you know, circumstance, that there are so many opportunities to have children in your life and and you have to find those.”